Want to know how to be more spontaneous in your relationship? How to mix it up?!
See the longer you’re with a person, the more comfortable it becomes. Which is great. Only with comfort comes routine, predictability. As a result of this – if you’re not careful – your relationship can start to turn a little stale…
Which is why it’s time to spice things up a little, to get back the spark and excitement from the very start! Here’s 10 quick-fire ways to be more spontaneous in your relationship.
Your challenge? To pick something to do TODAY. That’s right. There’s no better time than now. Seize the moment! Surprise your partner a little bit. It will work wonders for your relationship and really bring the two of you closer.
How To Be More Spontaneous In Your Relationship
If you want to be more spontaneous in your relationship, it’s all about making your relationship a priority again, and shifting your outlook around it.
At the start of the relationship, we always make time for our love interest, even if we’re short on time. We also think about things we can do which would be fun together. We know it’s important.
We’re building the groundwork here, getting to know this person, experiencing new things with them. The thing is, just because you’ve been together a long time, doesn’t mean that this should be forgotten about.
The first step to being more spontaneous in your relationship, is wanting to. Knowing that you need to. It’s easy to become complacent. To let the tiredness take over, feel like you don’t need to put the effort in, think that things are ‘fine right now anyway.’
They might be. But do you really want to strive for ‘fine’ when you can have something far greater? Get the desire in place for spontaneity, and it will really drive the rest of this. So, what can we do from there?
Seven Ways To Be More Spontaneous In Your Relationship
1) Think How You Can Surprise Them
A candle-lit dinner to come home to, a man-bath all ready and waiting for him, tickets to go to his favourite game at the weekend. There’s plenty of ways you can surprise your partner. It could even be something like, ‘accidentally’ forgetting your underwear, or buying a new, sexy outfit!
Have fun with it. Because why the hell not? You guys are comfortable around each other right? So see how the two of you can have even more fun, and become even closer. Long-term relationships don’t have to get dull!
2) Start Doing Different Date Nights
Another simple way to add spontaneity into your relationship is starting those date nights back up! Commit to a date night once every week, or once every other week. Gee, once a month is a start! But get into the habit of having a day or night, just for the two of you.
No phones, no distractions, just quality time spend together, doing something you enjoy. Just mix it up to make it more spontaneous. Perhaps take it in turns to decide what the two of you do, and your partner has no idea until the day / night.
You could also have a little challenge going on to see who can get the most creative or outrageous with it!
3) Try New Things In The Bedroom
Talking of spontaneity in your relationship, another way to keep things fresh and exciting is switching things up in the bedroom. You guys know what you like, that’s great.
But there’s no reason why you have to fall into the habit of doing the same things every time, or in the same place, at the same sort of time. Snoooooze. Spice things up a little. I’ll leave it to you to think outside the box with that one!
4) Forget About The Chores For A Day
Spontaneity is the opposite of routine. Does he usually take the trash out? Always have to do the washing up? A simple way to add more spontaneity into your relationship is simply surprising him by doing these chores for him.
Let him put his feet up after a hard day for a night (you might find he repays the favour by cooking more or taking over one of your chores when you need it too!) Or… simply both sack of the chores one night and do something WILD and exciting instead! Be rebels!
If you can’t do that every now and then, then that would be a damn shame.
5) Take a Road Trip or Day Trip
Life is made for ADVENTURES. Want to be more spontaneous in your relationship? Take more road trips or day trips and get out and explore… no matter how far away that is from home!
A change of scenery will do the both of you some good. It also adds a new element of unpredictability, and the new experiences in new locations give the two of you new things to talk about, and of course share in the moment. Really build that pool of special new memories!
6) Get Out Of Habits & Mix Up Your Routine
Do you guys have the same routine every evening? Then mix it up a bit by doing something after work, mid week. Are Saturday afternoons always the same? Then break the pattern. You’re not frickin’ 80. Your options are actually endless.
And as much as he may like sitting on his arse all afternoon watching the football, it won’t do him any harm to do something different with you after!
Start small if you need to. Like, if you always find yourselves eating at the same restaurants – why not, try somewhere new? If you find yourself drinking the same things in the same places, do a pub crawl somewhere else! Have fun together, push each other. Be brave!
Small changes to your usual habits or routines, don’t have to be done EVERY DAY. You don’t have to go overboard with it. But every week is healthy for keeping that spontaneity possible in your relationship. Just look at what seems a little ‘samey’ and think how it can be spiced up!
7) Listen To What They Say… And Act On It
Being more spontaneous in your relationship, doesn’t always have to be about big, bold changes or huge, romantic gestures. Sometimes the little things can mean just as much, and have the desired affect you’re looking for.
To know what to do, simply pay more attention to your partner. Listen to what he / she is saying.For example, let’s say he’s doing a lot of manual work at the moment and his back is giving him grief – help him out by giving him a massage to work away the knots.
If you notice he’s been looking at this new car part for ages, buy it for him without even asking him if he wants it. He won’t even expect it! If he says something in passing, note it and act on it. It will show just how much you care. You see? Small things, matter.
What Will You Do To Add a Little More Spontaneity Into Your Relationship?
Ultimately, if you want to be more spontaneous in your relationship, you need to think outside the box. Do things that are out of the ordinary, away from the ‘daily grind.’ A kind gesture, a little surprise, something a little bit different to break things up.
It does take effort, but like all things in life – you get out what you put in – and spontaneity really spices up your relationship, bringing the two of you closer and happier.
Good luck! For more relationship advice and tips, subscribe to my blog below and I’ll fill you in with the latest posts, just once every couple of weeks.