So the coronavirus is still with us and, for most of us, we’ve been forced to take a break from dating… at least at one point or another. But is it such a bad thing? Well, maybe not. In fact, let’s run through the benefits of taking a break from dating, and why actually, it might just do your love life the world of good…
The Benefits Of Taking a Break From Dating
Here’s seven quick-fire benefits of taking a break from dating. When you start to shift your outlook around it, you start to change how you feel. So, you ready?
1. It Forces You To Confront Your Loneliness
I know what you’re thinking, “And that’s a good thing, how?!” But actually it is. So many of us hate being single, because we can’t stand feeling lonely. But remember,
There’s a stark difference between being alone and being lonely…
When you take a break from dating, you’re probably going to feel lonely initially. But as you begin to readjust, you realise that you’re not really, and it’s not as bad as you built it up to be in your head.
By understanding this, we’re able to overcome it. You’re able to see that you have enough juice in your life to not actually need a significant other to complete you. It’s incredibly empowering and gets you standing on your own two feet again.
You just have to learn to ride it out initially, then gradually things get easier.
2. You’ll Do More With Your Life
When you’re single, you’ll go on a huge journey of self-discovery. It’s awesome. You have the whole world at your fingertips and can take your life in any direction you like. The more free you are, the more you’re likely to do, which is one of the benefits of taking a break from dating…
See, you won’t be meeting anyone, so there’s no-one there to make you potentially question your decisions or risk holding you back. You owe yourself this time now to live exactly for you.
If you are someone who gets feelings pretty fast, then that’s all the more reason to take a step back from dating so that you KNOW you won’t get sucked in by anyone and in turn, end up drifting from your oh-so-independent mission.
I know the end goal is to meet someone who’s right for you, but you don’t need to do it just yet and there are definitely advantages of putting it back a little bit. There’s no rush remember? There is more to life than just love (believe it or not!)
3. You Can Take The Time You Need To Reflect
Swipe by day, swipe by night, from one match to the next. There’s so many new people, so many different conversations, so many characters to learn from.
Just like you wouldn’t go from one relationship to the next, going from one date to another can get pretty exhausting too. You’re going to be in a better mental state if you’re able to take a breather. So, sometimes you just need to slow down a little, take a step back and see where you’re at.
When you do this, you can then better assess the different people you’ve met – what you’ve liked, what you haven’t… It will make it easier to establish what exactly you’re looking for. (Because the more dating you do, the more likely this is to change, as you start to figure it all out!)
You can also take time to reflect on yourself. Are you getting attached too easily? Are you letting your vision haze? Are you being the best version of yourself? Are you treating other people properly?
We should look within too, you know. Dating is a two way process. You shouldn’t just be out there for what you can get. So regardless of this, you need this time to really think about everything – otherwise, you’re going to end up missing things and are likely to make mistakes.
4. You Can Address The Things You’re Starting to Neglect
Dating can kind of take over our lives a little bit, can’t it? It’s not a bad thing. Relationships can do the same too. In fact, anything we focus on will take time away from other things. That’s just the way it is.
But, one of the benefits of taking a break from dating is you can re-address what got temporarily put on the backburner.
You can increase your time spent with friends and family, you can work on the things you really want to do, you can take more time for self-care again – to help you get rested and restored!
Life is all a bit of a balancing act, juggling the different components until you find what works for you.
Just don’t be too busy dating so intensely that you forget about the other things that are important. And when you do take a break from dating, make sure you’re using it to gain a greater sense of perspective again. You’re doing really well, don’t forget it!
5. You Can Work On Loving Yourself Again
Never, and I repeat, NEVER, be so busy chasing guys, or the idea of love, that you forget how important it is to love yourself first. You actually want to reach the point where you’re happily single. Where you know you don’t need someone, you just want to find someone that complements the life that you have.
If you’re not quite there yet, it really is a great idea to take a break from dating until you can feel this. In fact, make it your mission and don’t get BACK into dating until you’re sure of how damn brilliant you are!
Once you do this, you’ll then start to attract far better people and in turn, find a better partner. So it pays off to take the time to work on you. This leads me onto my next point…
6. It Stops You From Using Dating as an Escape
Alright, it’s time to get a little deep again. You know me, I just can’t help myself! But it’s good to be a little thought-provoking sometimes, because it helps you to see the things you might have been hiding.
See sometimes we throw ourselves into dating, to distract ourselves from the things we’d prefer to avoid. Maybe you don’t feel happy in yourself, like I just mentioned previously (hence why you have to start focusing on loving yourself again first!)
Maybe you’re not over your ex and you’re looking for someone to replace him or her. Maybe you feel pretty sh*t about what you’ve achieved in your life, but when you’re dating, you feel desirable – so you focus on that instead.
Uh huh, there are no end to the possibilities of what you may be using dating for. But if it’s anything other than finding the right person to spend the rest of your life with, you’ve actually got it all wrong!
Don’t use dating as a way to hide away or avoid confronting the issues you might have. Taking a break from dating will force you to revisit the things you buried under the surface. But, it’s a good thing. Because you can’t move forward until you’ve done this. So don’t be afraid, okay? It’s all part of the journey.
7. It’ll Give You a Fresh Burst of Motivation
I talk about how to stay motivated whilst dating in this post. It’s well worth a read if you haven’t already seen it! But that’s one of the benefits of taking a break from dating.
Distance makes the heart grow fonder as they say! So if you leave dating for a little while, when you do go back to it – it’s just so much more FUN.
There’s ‘fresh blood’, the conversations don’t seem as ‘samey’, you actually appreciate the new relationships that you start to build and all the opportunities you have, instead of getting tired and becoming cynical.
A break really helps to shift your mindset and give you a fresh new burst of motivation for when you do go back to it. So don’t think you’re wasting time by stopping – you’re not, you’re actually making it better.
Let’s Round Things Up
In all honesty, this is just touching the surface for the benefits of taking a break from dating. Financially you’re going to see the difference, emotionally you’re going to be stronger (if you can get past your fears of loneliness that is!) and it will really shake up your love life – stopping you from falling into what’s familiar and instead, forcing you to find happiness within.
When taking a break from dating, use the time to focus on you again. Work on areas of yourself and your life you know that you can improve, build on the relationships that you already have, spend time restoring yourself emotionally or spiritually. You really can make the best of it, but only if you want to.
So decide to embrace it! And you may well find, being alone is not as bad as you first thought.
Take care!
Love,
Ell_xx
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