Want to make 2023 the year that you find love? Looking for the best dating app tips to increase your success rate and ultimately, find the right person? Then you’re in the right place!
Here’s our top 10 dating app tips for 2023. Read it, follow it, and then watch the difference it makes to your “dating game!”
See finding love doesn’t have to feel like such a battle, and dating apps don’t have to be such a dreaded thing… Providing you do the RIGHT things when you’re on them.
So let’s get stuck in, shall we?
10 Best Dating App Tips For 2023
In no particular order, here’s our top 10 dating app tips to help you find love faster and easier, in 2023. Uh huh, it’s time to spruce up your dating app strategy! Here we go…
1) Swipe Slower
Do you find yourself swiping through dating app profiles at lightening speed? Deciding whether it’s a “yes” or no in a matter of seconds?! (Or milli-seconds even?!)
See, it’s easily done. In fact, studies show the majority of swiping decisions on dating apps are made in less than a SECOND.
Which is kind of crazy – right?! I mean, that’s not long enough to scroll through all of their photos, let alone read what they’ve written on their profile.
But that’s one of the problems with dating today… There’s so many profiles on dating apps, they can feel limitless. But these are real people, real “potentials” that you could be missing.
So slow down. If you find yourself skipping through, it’s probably down to dating burnout or boredom.
In which case – taking a slight break from dating apps until you can (and want to) do it properly, is actually the best idea!
Then, when you are on the dating apps – remain focused.
You don’t have to scrutinise over each and every profile, but you should carefully consider if you’d be – at least – open to getting to know them, based on what you take the time to see.
2) Make The Most of The Matches You Have
On a similar note – one of the BIGGEST dating app mistakes is not making the most of the matches that you make. See, it probably goes a little like this:
- You swipe a load of profiles.
- You get a load of matches come through.
- They say hey, or you say hey. (Or give one of your badass opening lines that actually get FAR better responses! 😛 ) But here’s the thing…
- You have too many conversations going on with different people, in one go.
- Some people get outright ignored (which makes it pretty pointless you matching them in the first place.)
- Some people you forget about. (And when / if you realise this – you may be a little bit “miffed” as if there weren’t so many people on your account, you’d actually have wanted to take the time to get to know them more!)
- You’re also likely to reply slower, which loses the momentum of the conversation and makes your match wonder, “are they even interested in me?!”
- Or – you don’t put everything into the conversation as there’s too many going on. You can’t quite focus. And so the QUALITY (of the conversations) due to the QUANTITY (of the matches that you have), isn’t everything that it can be.
So, it’s a waste. A big waste. And yes, you may have a huge pool of people are your fingertips, but it means nothing if you’re not working through them properly. So – what you need to do…
How You Can Make The Most Of Your Matches
Moving forward, you want to establish a newer, slicker and more effective method on dating apps, so that you make sure you’re not missing opportunities. Instead of the above…
Step 1) Swipe In Batches
Log onto your app, and swipe for 5-10 minutes until you start getting a couple of matches back.
(You might want to play around with this, to establish how long you typically need to swipe to get a more manageable number of matches back.
What’s “manageable” will vary depend on who you are, what you’re looking for and how long you’re spending on dating apps, so set your own guidelines for this.)
Step 2) Focus On Those Matches
Once you get the matches through, send the messages that you need. (And don’t wait or delay – it’s just pointless!)
Get the conversation going, get the questions flowing and really get to know these people.
Have fun, let conversation flow naturally, whilst casually throwing in your qualifying questions to better determine the “potential” of each person and how much time they’re worth investing in.
Step 3) Only THEN Can You Make New Matches
Now as conversation goes on, you’ll start to establish who you are and aren’t interested in and who does and doesn’t tick those essential first “boxes”.
Remember – it’s okay if not everyone excites you or if someone has the “deal breakers” you don’t want to see. “You have to kiss a few frogs before you find your Prince”, as they say!
But every time you get to know someone who ISN’T for you, it takes you one step further to finding the person who IS.
(After all, unless you’re super lucky, dating apps are a bit of a numbers game to find the people that you genuinely click with!)
- Those who you are potentially interested in, you can then organise a date with.
- Those who you AREN’T interested in – you can allow conversation to trail off, express this to them, or – if you really need to – you can un-match them.
- Only then can you start to swipe MORE people, to bring in NEW matches. (You must properly go through this process first!)
See it won’t work exactly as a “one in, one out” system, but you should only have a manageable number of active conversations going on, at one time. This makes dating on dating apps far easier and more effective then, so it’s an absolute essential dating app tip for 2023!
3) Have Fun With It
Next up on our dating app tips list, is to HAVE FUN WITH IT! Enjoy dating apps and everything that they offer, instead of criticising them or getting down about things.
And I know, I know, it sounds so simple, but it’s the part that too many forget.
Because hey – yes, the end goal may be to find a life-long relationship and yes, that may be difficult to find… But that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t and can’t enjoy the journey!
So instead of fixating on where you want to be and where you aren’t right now, have fun with this crazy, exciting ride that you’re on.
And sure – it’s not going to be great all the time…
You’ll have rejection, heartache and maybe even feel like pulling your hair out at times(!), but are relationships 100% plane sailing once you’re in them? No way!
And it’s important not to forget that.
Life isn’t one set, linear path of pure, contentment. There will always be ups & downs, highs & lows and plus sides / down sides of every situation and every life stage.
But your dating life stage can be AMAZING. It can make you learn, grow and develop you into the person you need to be to find the love you really deserve.
So shift the way you see it, use positive dating affirmations to guide you, and appreciate single life (and all the benefits that come with it!)
See, outlook really is EVERYTHING – in life and when it comes to online dating too. So if you’re going to go on dating apps, go on them with the right frame of mind or don’t go on there at all.
Remember you want to attract the right kind of person and you will not do that will a lousy attitude.
You’ll also only end up wasting your time as a lousy attitude will stop you from giving everyone a proper chance…
So this is an essential (and totally underrated!) dating app tip, for many reasons!
Dating App Tips for 2023
4) Forget About Your “Type”
DID YOU KNOW – if I hadn’t of met my boyfriend, by chance, as strangers, and we’d instead been swiping on a dating app, we’d need have actually matched?!
Uh huh, I love my man with all my heart and he is everything I could want and need (and more!)… But back when I was dating, I had a set type.
Adam also didn’t have a strong “selfie game” and he’s dyslexic so he would have had next to nothing written on his dating profile, which would have made it a swipe LEFT from me!
But this is just one example of how – if you stick to your type – you could actually be missing out on so many people…
Not only people who – if you met them in person first – you know that you’d find attractive, but also people who you THINK wouldn’t be good for you, but actually would!
Because here’s the thing – your “type” can sometimes be your worst enemy.
- Are you being driven by looks? Or by the wrong things, for the wrong reasons?
- Are you unsure about what you want and need in a partner? And what are the most important things?
- Are you going for a set type of person every time, and aren’t giving others a chance?
- Are you finding the same (or similar!) negative experiences happening again and again?
See, the first step is to simply recognise your behaviour and patterns. And being willing to open your heart and mind to other people.
Is attraction important? Yes. But can you find someone more attractive? Absolutely.
Is there a chance you should shake up the things you are and aren’t drawn towards? Well, that’s for you to answer. But this is certainly something to think about. On a similar note…
5) Be Aware of Your Patterns
We all have patterns, habits and behaviours when it comes to dating. Some which are helpful. Some which are not. For instance:
- Do you find that you’re attracted to the “bad boys“? The people who are supposedly “hard to get”?
- Are you intrigued by people who feel unattainable? Do you secretly want to “win them over” or make them want you?
- Do you find that you’re chasing men? Putting in most of the work, most of the time? Or getting sucked into playing games, and trying to work out “hot and cold” behaviour, instead of walking away?
Why might you do this? Well to touch on just a few reasons…
It could be down to a lack of self-worth and your subconscious beliefs that you don’t deserve love, that others aren’t capable of meeting your needs, or that love is not real unless you have to earn it…
See, people often subconsciously try to heal what happened in the past by repeating the same dynamic they witnessed previously and hold onto the hope that it will work out this time around.
It could also be down to a deeper (possibly unknown) fear of intimacy, or the fact that parts of you are unavailable which may be why you’re drawn to emotionally unavailable partners too.
Or, it could stem as deep as the impact of your childhood and lessons you learnt early on, about love.
Whatever it is – and I know you probably didn’t expect to be confronted with this here – but recognising your habits, finding the root cause and working through them, is one of the best things you can do, to take positive steps forward in finding a healthy love…
How This Relates To Dating Apps:
Once you’re aware of your patterns in dating – and the wrong people you could be drawn towards:
- It may change the way you swipe. It’s difficult to judge what a person is truly like from their profile alone, but if it doesn’t help you avoid people based on first impressions, it will – at the very least – influence how open you are to giving other, different people a chance.
- It will change what you’re attracted to. (This is a big one, and the essence of it!)
See, once you understand your patterns in dating, you can challenge your mind to stop being drawn to the WRONG things and start being drawn to the RIGHT things.
You can literally challenge this with the power of your mind once you have strong enough reasons why. (E.G. Playing hard to get is not cool and genuine interest – and knowing where you stand with a person – is actually far cooler! “I’m going to go for that!”)
- It will make you know your boundaries. I.E. What you will and won’t tolerate, and when you should / shouldn’t pursue a person. This leads me onto my top dating app tip…
Best Dating App Tips for 2023
6) Know Your Boundaries
Another core essential when it comes to dating app tips, is to know your boundaries. What do we mean by this? Well, let me ask you a question…
- Do you give far more, when dating?
- And tolerate things that you perhaps shouldn’t?
- Are you unsure what is and isn’t right when dating?
- Or what would / wouldn’t lead to a healthy relationship?
Well, that’s for you to now take the time to establish as it’s one of the biggest time-savers (and heart-ache savers!) when it comes to dating.
See, the last dating app tip will challenge what you’re attracted to.
When you then know your boundaries you’re able to better recognise if the person you match with and meet, then really is who you think they are, and who you want / need in a partner.
Remember – you deserve the love you’ve always dreamed of. And that’s not this unrealistic fairytale romance (although at times you may feel like what you have is surely too good to be true?!)
Instead, it’s about being loved the right way – fully and completely – by the right person… Someone who excites you, someone who values you, and someone who feels the same way about you, as you do about them.
All these bad experiences you’ve been having? They’re draining, and taint your dating app experiences.
So understanding boundaries, knowing your boundaries, and being able to stick to them, is a must, must, must dating app tip for 2023.
7) Ask Different Questions
Our next dating app tip is to really focus on CONVERSATION!
See, one of the biggest dating app mistakes is asking the same old questions. The ones like: “how are you?” “what you up to?” “had a good day?” Snore, snore, snore.
Remember – you’re not chatting to an old or new friend here. You’re trying to genuinely get to know this person to see if they’re someone worth pursuing.
Are you going to know that based on how their day was? I don’t think so.
Especially as you’re still practically strangers at this point, so they’re hardly going to tell you the ins and outs of their day anyway!
Instead – make the most of the time you’re investing in speaking to them.
Start off with a strong opening line, as this will increase the number of responses you get back, plus set the conversation off on the right tone.
Then from there – speak with more purpose and a clearer intention.
You can still make it FUN, mixing up the different dating app questions you ask. But make each question help you learn more about the person – better understanding who they are, what they’re all about and how well you seem to click.
8) Show Your True Personality
Pictures are important on dating apps. No-one wants old, blurry or unclear photos.
However, on the flip side, having entirely perfectly-posed “instagram shots” on dating apps isn’t always the best way to go either…
Is it real? Is it the truest reflection of you? Does it show who you are at your core? Or does it show what you want people to see?
See, you can still include your Instagram feed on dating apps – most now have the feature so that people can see your posts, without being able to see your username. (Which helps to keep you safe.)
So you can still utilise this, but alongside it:
- Show a mix of photos – photos where you most feel LIKE YOU.
- Think about the impression your photos give off, and what they’re likely to attract… Are they attracting the wrong people, going back to your “usual type”? Would it be worth experimenting with different selections to see the impact of that?
- Are you showing how fun you are? The different sides of you and your life?
- Are you getting across some of your passions in your photos?
- Can you confidently say that your profile is letting your most AUTHENTIC self, shine through?
See, it’s not just about photos – but the things you write on your profile too.
In fact, the question boxes on dating apps, and bio spaces, provide the best opportunity for you to get across your personality… So really take the time and effort into writing all of this properly.
(Then replicate your profiles as closely as possible, across different dating apps for consistency. Show “what dating me is like” from your profile and make them WANT to date you!)
BONUS TIP: Swap “Standard” for “Specific”
Building on this further, a quick dating app tip for making sure your personality shines through on dating apps, is to swap “standard” for “specific” to make your profile fun, quirky and original.
For instance: if you love sushi, don’t just say “I love sushi” on your profile. Everyone says that and it’s easy to say. It means nothing. In fact, if anything – it works against you.
Instead (use the rule – swap “standard” for “specific” and) change it to detailing your favourite dish or go-to restaurant.
E.G. “Nothing beats Yasai Rolls🍣” / “Sunday’s are for Ramen & reading! 👌”
It shows your genuine interest in whatever you’re talking about and makes your profile stand out far more.
Dating App Tips for 2023
9) Be Honest About What You’re Looking For
We’re flying through these dating app tips now, but not without reminding you that “honesty is the best policy” – both in life and in love.
So don’t be afraid to be honest about what you’re looking for! This means:
- You don’t have to pretend if you’re not quite ready for a relationship. (You shouldn’t try to kid yourself or put on an act with the people you match with.) On the flip side…
- You don’t have to pretend or try to “play it cool” if you’ve been single a while, you know you want something serious, but you don’t want to scare people off…
At the end of the day, the only people you’d scare is the WRONG people, who aren’t looking for the same things as you, which in turn is a blessing – as it saves you time and heartache!
Oh, and by the way – you don’t have to come across as “desperate” or like you’re coming on too strong too soon by saying you want something serious. It’s all about how you phrase things.
I mean, isn’t someone who knows what they want, far more attractive, anyway? If someone asks what you’re looking for, you can say something like:
- “I’m definitely ready to find the right person now, but I’m not going to settle and am super happy where I am in the meantime.”
It’s cool, it’s calm, it’s honest and it’s true… Especially if you can reach the point of being happily single (something which should be just as big of a priority as finding love itself!)
On the flip side, if you’re not ready to get into something heavy just yet, you don’t need to pour your heart out or use your dating app as a therapy session. Something like:
- “I don’t think I’m ready for a new relationship just yet. But I’m open and looking forward to getting to know new people and seeing where things go, with time.”
… That will do the job! You can then continue to get to know them, but know that you’re both on the same page and won’t be messing anyone else around either. You see?
10) Don’t Give Up!
Last but not least then – our final (and one of the most important dating app tips when it comes to finding love in 2023) is to not give up…
Don’t give up on finding love and don’t give up on dating apps themselves.
Yes, there are alternatives to dating apps and ways to meet people in “real life” too. But that isn’t necessarily better or easier than using dating apps.
I mean, the majority of American online daters, say relationships from dating platforms are as successful as in-person meetings. In fact, some say that such relationships are more successful than relationships that started in person.
Dating apps are pretty powerful…
They give you access to THOUSANDS of single people, right there, at your fingertips, and when you opt to use the more serious dating apps, you have a huge pool of people, looking for similar things…
It’s then just a case of time, effort and patience, to sort through all of these “prospects”.
But if you stick with it – I promise you – there will be not just one, but multiple, suitable people on there, ready for you. You just have to find them… And that can actually be the fun part too!
So take breaks from dating apps when you need to, don’t FIXATE on finding the one, but be proactive in your search for love… And have fun with it; knowing – with confidence – that it will come!
That’s All For This One
So there we have it – our top 10 dating app tips for 2023.
Remember: knowledge is not power until it is APPLIED! So be sure to put these tips into action to get the best results on dating apps in 2023.
Got any questions? Please don’t hesitate to get in touch. If not – I wish you the very best on your journey to finding love.